tamabonotchi: ([Hetalia] Gib mir einen Kuss)
[personal profile] tamabonotchi

Title: Mirror
Fandom: Hetalia
Rating: Teen
Disclaimer: Fem!Germany-centric, set at the end of WWII, split Germanys
Summary: Everyone was silent until they heard a noise from the figure on the ground. Germany's eyes fell upon him. The one that caused it all. The one who was but a reflection.
Notes: I had an idea for a serious WWII fic that entertained the idea of two split Germanys- regular Germany and Nazi Germany- as well as make Germany a girl. I've had this idea for quite a while, and had initially started writing a fic about it late last year. Went I looked it over I decided it was really bad (like, really bad- I can't believe I even wrote that bad) so I started rewriting it and forgot about it. Found it again today and decided to finish it, as well as trying to focus on the idea I had. It's OK, not perfect, but I liked it well enough to say done! More notes at the end.

She was Deutschland.

She was Deutschland.

It seemed like it was all over when she was found. Russian soldiers seized her from the dilapidated house and pushed her into a car, closing the door. The car started and traveled over the destroyed road. She observed the destruction all around her- buildings abandoned and broken into, burned from fires. Somewhere she would probably find rubble from one of the many bombs that she had heard hit so close.


"Ve, it's you again!" Italy greeted Germany warmly. They were both in dark uniforms, yet neither had been on the battlefield since the first time they met.

"Good day." Germany could only mutter a greeting, in shock of her new surroundings and the man in front of her.

"Let's do something fun today! Rome is really pretty; we have a lot of beautiful art and women around and the greatest food! Are you hungry? I'm hungry! Maybe we can go eat some pasta right now! Pasta is delicious, don't you think? I heard you eat lots of potatoes in Germany is that right? Potatoes are OK, but I couldn't eat them every day. You know, you're really pretty! You were scary before, and you still look like a man in those pants-"

"Italy. This trip is for business between our leaders." Germany berated. "…And I do not wear dresses or skirts." Italy flinched at her cold voice, but instantly the smile appeared on his face. This time though, it was a smaller smile, almost flirting with just a twitch of the lips.

"It's between our bosses, but not us, right? Come on, Germany, come with me! Maybe we can find something pretty for you to wear, even if it's pants!" Italy grasped Germany's hand and tugged her toward him. She couldn't help but flush in embarrassment. She was not used to this; no country has ever flirted with her like this. Even worse, she wanted to give in to the personable smile.

"…Only if time allows, we can have a small meal. Then I have to go back to my boss." Germany complied, staring at the Italian's large eyes. Italy made noises of happiness and joy as he tugged her to start moving, as they walked down a stone street hand-in-hand, receiving odd looks from passersby.


She ignored the other country inside the car- Italy. He was silent, solemn. She knew what he had done. She had long disappeared from the eye of anyone and tried to live as a human, but every bomb, every casualty sent a strike of pain within her. She was still a nation, but a nation who could do nothing as she watched and listened as so many of her people died.

She wouldn't forgive him. He betrayed Germany, and surrendered. Both knew that.

"I'm so happy to see you again, Germany." Italy said, breaking the silence. He glanced at the nation, but she looked away. "I… really missed Germany."

She did not respond. Her body only ached more when Italy spoke, but she tried to ignore it.

"I was really confused when I went to visit Germany, I couldn't find you anywhere. I even asked that scary man. He said he was Germany, which made me even more confused- I knew Germany liked to wear manly clothes, but didn't remember her actually being manly." The Italian babbled. Germany wanted to react, but willed herself to remain emotionless. Her sunken face really helped, but it did not discourage Italy.

"I really missed Germany… I remembered the time you came to Italy, and we had such a great time. I couldn't believe of what happened-"

"Italy. Stop talking." Germany's voice interrupted, snapping at the man. Italy flinched back and remained silent for the rest of their trip until the car stopped. They walked out of the car into a neighborhood that was deserted. Germany couldn't swallow the feeling that any moment now, bile would raise from her stomach. Italy looked just as affected, but ignored it as he walked down a small street.

Germany silently followed him, staring at his back in caution, looking into every shadow for the rest of them. She walked into a clearing when she noticed Italy stopping, and looked around.

They were all there.

Before she could react, England had caught her from her side. They wrestled to the ground before America came over and secured a rope around Germany. Several more tied her wrists together so she was unable to fight back, but it was only a precaution. None of them were in the condition to fight anymore. Germany finally surveyed her surroundings, at every figure there.

Italy had been dragged far to the side by his brother. He looked like he was about to burst into tears and wanted to run over to her, but the strong hand around his arm stopped him from moving. By them was France. He was almost all bandages and rags, but still had the energy to look at her with distaste. England was right beside her when she looked over at America, and saw the still figure on the grounding below him.

"So you have him." Germany muttered, turning away.

"Mind explaining?" England asked. When Germany remained silent, England grabbed her shoulder and shook her. "Well?"

"Deutsches Reich, he was the one you were fighting if you didn't realize." Germany remarked. England sneered at her smart reply.

"But you're Germany." America called out in shock. Everyone was silent until they heard a noise from the figure on the ground. Germany's eyes fell upon him. The one that caused it all. He opened one eye, the other covered by a bandage. For a moment he just stared up unfocused before his look settled on her. She felt an involuntary shudder spread through her body as even with one eye and looking dead, he could still strike a terror in her. When he began processing information, he mouth turned upwards into a smirk like he did not even know that he had lost.

"Luise. It's been a while since I have seen you. I would have kept watch on you, but I had become particularly busy." He said it so nonchalantly while bleeding from several bullet wounds, it made her sick. He was the thing that drove her away, taking everything from her.


When she walked into the large office, the first thing she saw was herself. She took a double take when she realized it wasn't a mirrored image, but another person- a man- standing in front of her with a familiar face. They both looked practically the same, she realized, like siblings.

"Who are you?" She demanded.

"I am Deutsches Reich." His low voice answered, staring steadily back at her. She was taken aback at that, momentarily stunned. Had the world gone upside down?

"I'm sorry, but I do not see the humor in the joke. I am Deutschland." Germany remarked, sneering. She looked over at her boss in dismay. "What is the meaning of this?"

"It's no longer Germany, but the Third Reich." The other nation clarified to her, a sadistic smile growing on his face. She could feel something rise in her- no, it couldn't be fear- at the implications that were hitting her. It simply wasn't Germany anymore, it had become something new. Still, she could not understand why this could happen. Countries continuously changed official names in history, but they weren't replaced with a new person.

"B-but… why are you..?"

"The new Germany would not be female." That was the last thing the man said- the new country that had emerged from her work that would be taking her place- before she was taken out of the office by two soldiers. She had ordered them to release her, she was their superior officer, but neither listened. She demanded to see Prussia, but once again they ignored her.

She could practically feel any power she had left disappear from her being, reduced to a simple human. No matter what she had tried in the military, she could not go anywhere. The presence from him seemed to haunt her, his image always appearing in reflections staring back at her.


Germany remained still, shaking in anger as the Allies now saw what was happening. Italy sobbed openly, holding his brother for what little support both still had. Germany never broke eye contact with him, even while he talked to the Allies about meaningless stuff.

"What's wrong, Luise? If it weren't for me, you would have probably surrendered at the first sign of struggle; the Fuehrer couldn't have that. You would have been weak." He said to her like they were having a casual conversation. It was almost private, as none of the other nations could completely understand.

"You're a pig going to Hell. You still surrendered, only after running the country into the ground. Thousands of lives could have spared, and you couldn't stop the Russians from destroying all of Berlin." Germany bit back, almost snarling at him. To that, he only chuckled.

"Where is my brother?" Germany turned to look England. As if on cue, two more soldiers and Russia appeared, holding a limp body covered in dirt and blood, but Germany could see the faint traces of pale hair underneath the grime. England instructed them, and they brought the body closer, dropping him feet from Germany. Prussia gave a groan as he sat up from the dirt.

"It looks like they are reunited now." Russia suggested, but his voice held no cheerful tone. At that, Prussia looked and saw Germany, tears daring to fall any moment. In an instant, Prussia ignored any screams from his body as he practically crawled to Germany and engulfing her in his arms.

"W-West!" Prussia gasped, and Germany could hear the different mix of emotions- pained, relief, joy, and something she couldn't quite place. But it didn't matter, as she finally broke down, in front of all of them as she cried into his shoulder and calling his name.


Germany never wore dresses. It was odd, even to the countries, that she always wore men's clothing.

But, she wanted to ask, why wear a skirt when you have a failing economy?

It definitely warded off any unnecessary and unwanted attention. France would not even spare a glance at her while she wore these clothes, unless it was to demand more of what she did not have.

"West, look at this damn trunk full of dresses I bought for you! Most of 'em are pretty old, but I found really amazing clothes back then." Prussia whistled when he found the trunk. Germany turned from her cleaning to give him an annoyed look.

"Brother, you're supposed to be helping with cleaning, not looking at old clothing. Leave those for now, maybe we can sell them. It's no use keeping them anyway"

"Nuh-uh, we ain't selling these. They were worth a lot back before, and you wouldn't find anyone willing to buy one of them." Prussia refused. She couldn't help but agree, and kept quiet.

"I've always wanted to see you in one these, West!"

"I don't wear dresses, Brother."

"Yeah yeah, but denying you're a girl and wearing pants for all your life won't grow you a dick. Come on, West, look at Hungary! She was just like you, but even she wears dresses." Prussia complained. Germany just dismissed the idea and continued on with the cleaning.

It was days like this that Germany enjoyed the most, even after losing a world war.


The memories flowed through her mind of her brother, burying her face into his body as she couldn't touch him. Unrestrained, Prussia felt every inch of her bruised body and kissed every inch of bare skin, though sickly it was. She knew he didn't want anything else but to be able to cry as well, but he couldn't. In front of the rest of them, he'd remain strong even though he was probably the weakest of all. He could only hope they would get a private moment, the first one in years.

"Dammit, West, you should've told me where you were, we could've ran off and not-be-countries together." Prussia whispered quietly as they calmed down, but remained in the other's embrace. Germany felt a pang of guilt, which slowly began to grow.

"I'm sorry, Brother." She mumbled, but Prussia only squeezed her.

"Hello, Gilbert." His voice rang out in the silence, breaking the sibling's bubble of ease. Germany could feel Prussia's grip clench when he turned around to see the other Germany.

"Oh, you're still alive? You should have killed yourself." Prussia replied. It hit a nerve when the man's eyes glinted in a dangerous glare, ready to retort when England interrupted.

"That's enough; I'm not standing here much longer. And, it seems you're not going to last any longer now." England cut in. Germany realized that he was right, looking at the dying nation. The other Germany couldn't say anything as his mouth filled with blood, coughing to gain air. This was it. The Deutsches Reich was going to die.

"One more shot should do it." France's voice echoed, nodding at America.

"W-wait!" The man cried out through the thick blood, gasping. He looked up at Germany, and their eyes connected once more. It was like looking at a mirror again, as Germany could feel warm liquid in her throat and mouth, choking her. Those dark thoughts that had once invaded her mind before he came were surging through her brain. All she could hear was the sound of blood, and her heartbeat in her ears while all she could see was him, staring straight into his eyes that grew dimmer. She wanted to scream, but no sound came from her mouth.

For a second, she could hear his voice in her head say something, but everything snapped from the crack in the air and it all became silent.

Afterward, it all seemed like a blur to Germany. After all of that, they still were not finished. They dragged Germany and Prussia apart and were taken separate ways. Germany vaguely remembered her screaming as she watched her brother being hauled by Russia, struggling to break free from the ties and from France's hold. By the time they moved her into another car to, presumably, a prison she passed out. A while later did she find out she had a fresh bullet wound and lost a good amount of blood that caused it.

That was what made her realize all that happened between them. They had been connected since the very beginning. Those thoughts that flooded her mind were from him, but ultimately they had always been from her. All that he was came from her, and she had it all back to bear for the rest of history as Germany. It had always been one country.

Germany had to accept it all, because no matter what she did, he would still be there, in the reflection.


Notes:

I chose Fem!Germany's name to be Luise to follow the pattern that Germany's human name was from famous people (Ludwig) Luise was after Luise, the queen consort of Prussia and wife to King Friedrich Wilhelm III.

Technically women could work in Nazi Germany for places like the labor camps where they watch over the Jewish and other populations making items for the military, but the ideal woman was supposed to produce offspring and support the family with more children. Did I need a note about this?

If anything is unclear I can try to clarify, because I did make quite a few other references but I thought they were self-explanatory. Any comment would be wonderful to receive!

 

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